Greetings Lion fans.

There is much news. Firstly, Leslie's accident. I can only stress that it was an ACCIDENT, no matter what he says, and whilst the sight of him in flames was mildly diverting, we must thank the quick-witted theatre manager for putting him out. Leslie and I had a slight altercation in the ambulance over who was going to pay for the curtains, and as such he is taking a sabbatical as my regular pianist. I have therefore engaged the pianical services of a Mr Hilary Cox, who is a very clean man and doesn't keep Terry's Chocolate Oranges all to himself and shares them out, Leslie take note. He has also agreed to wash my jacket, and expects to have some good results in a few weeks time.

Hilary and myself will be performing at the Menier Chocolate Factory until the 11th of November, why not come along!